Ha, I just got the best peice of spam in the world. For your enjoyments I quote a selection here:

"However, there is no place for the story of my life here because I have written
many parts of it already on my former trees. Now there is only something to
give you the picture how it happened that I am still alive. Perhaps some of you
still remember the basic chemistry. Just imagine a suicide guy who wanted to
kill himself as effectively as possible. He prepared for himself a mixture of
an alkali NaOH and an acid HCl. Prepared for his death, he wrote his final
letter, mixed the components and swallowed the lethal beverage. He expected to
be dead in a minute or two but nothing like that happened except that he got
infinitely thirsty and wanted to drink a whole bucket of water. This unhappy
guy was lucky because of the chemical reaction NaOH + HCl -> NaCl + H2O that
reduced the alkali with the acid to salted water. However, please do not try it
at home, because first it has to be perfectly balanced in the chemical reaction
to achieve that neutral Ph7 in the stomach."

Is that not just great, and it goes on and on and on. Anyone who wants to read the whole thing just let me know.

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